I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
