I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
