We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
