I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
did i walk over a car last night?
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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