we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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