That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
we're making bets on your personal life
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
