Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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