he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
