New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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