dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize
