I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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