3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize