I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
