she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Two words: blizzard sex
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