I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Randomize