your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
