Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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