I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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