I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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