That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
