Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
