so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
