It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
