ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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