The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize