It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I need a burrito and a hug.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
