I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
