I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
