Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
