The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Randomize
