I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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