Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Randomize
