She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
