just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
He did a backflip because drugs
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
