Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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