new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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