your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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