I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Randomize