My room smells like vodka and shame
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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