it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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