shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Drake has all the answers
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
