you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Still dying that you shit outside
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Randomize
