He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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