she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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