I love black thongs
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
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