ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
