What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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