the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
