she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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