I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
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